The Truth of the Matter
“Truth or dare?”
It comes out as barely a whisper, his voice hoarse as the night catches up with him.
Our legs tangle together as we sit across from each other. His more than overlapping mine.
I smile slightly as I look into his face. I know what he wants before I even see his eyes lower to my lips and his tongue dart out. I can feel the familiar hammer of my heart and prickle of my skin and I know I need to prolong the inevitable before it swallows us both up.
I see the disappointment across his face and watch his forehead burrow as he deliberates his response. The cogs in his brain turn and I want nothing more than to reach in there and switch them all around. So that he will see me differently, so that he wont notice the stars in my eyes and get sucked in.
Finally a soft smile reminds me of the crevices in his cheeks and all I want to do is collide with him and see if the explosions really will end us.
His voice cracks and a little piece of me cracks along with it.
“If you had picked dare, what would you want me to ask you to do?”
He stumbles over his words even though I know he rehearsed them first. I think of the thousands of answers I could give him and how he is only hoping for one. How that one could open up a million possibilities and I had the power to unlock them all.
But the thought paralyses me. I can tell I’m taking my time and that he would wait forever for me.
And again I realise I can’t give in to this boy. He deserved a girl who would be right there with him, not one that was already floating away and would take all the pieces of his heart along with her.
I stand up and pull him with me. His hug envelopes me as it has so many times before and I wait for him to pick me up the way he always has. When he doesnt I find my mouth close to his ear.
” I would want you to ask me to jump into the lake,” I whisper.
His laughter rumbles and seems to pour every part of him into me.
“It’s freezing cold!” He tell me.
“Which is why I wouldn’t do it,” I counter before I shrug and head back towards the drinks.
I hear him sigh and start after me. “You’re impossible!” I hear his shout behind me before the music drowns him out.
I feel the urge to look back, but don’t. If only he knew how very impossible it all was.